


Psy[chotic] Phone Tag

by stillskies



Category: Gouhou Drug | Legal Drug, xxxHoLic
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-04
Updated: 2012-03-04
Packaged: 2017-11-01 02:25:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/350924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stillskies/pseuds/stillskies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rikuo and Kazahaya go on a mission. Things go awry. Kakei and Yuuko play phone tag.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Psy[chotic] Phone Tag

**Author's Note:**

  * For [chaineddove](https://archiveofourown.org/users/chaineddove/gifts).
  * Translation into English available: [Дурдом на проводе](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1062940) by [orphan_account](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account)



> Originally posted 07-06-2006.

"Thank you for calling the Green Drugstore. Our store hours are 10am to 6pm daily. If this is an emergency, be assured that one of our delivery boys are on their way. If you have a private matter that you wish to discuss with the manager, please leave your name and number after the beep. We appreciate your business here at Green Drugstore. Have a pleasant day."

_Beep._

"Damn it, Kakei. I know you're sitting there laughing at us. Answer the phone!"

"Rikuo! You can't talk to Kakei-san like that!"

"Shut up, Kazahaya. It's your fault for taking this job, and it's his for offering it to you in the first place."

"I never asked you to come with me!" I told you I'd be fine without-- Eep!"

_Click._

+++

"Thank you for calling the Green Drugstore. Our store hours are 10am to 6pm daily. If this is an emergency, be assured that one of our delivery boys are on their way. If you have a private matter that you wish to discuss with the manager, please leave your name and number after the beep. We appreciate your business here at Green Drugstore. Have a pleasant day."

_Beep._

"Kakei-san! Please answer the phone if you're there. That asshole pissed of the spirit-- Aah!"

"Shit! Kazahaya, duck you idiot!"

"Get off of me, Rikuo!"

"You sure you want that? You seem pretty happy to have me here."

"Pervert!"

_Click._

+++

"Thank you for calling the Green Drugstore. Our store hours are 10am to 6pm daily. If this is an emergency, be assured that one of our delivery boys are on their way. If you have a private matter that you wish to discuss with the manager, please leave your name and number after the beep. We appreciate your business here at Green Drugstore. Have a pleasant day."

_Beep._

"Saiga. I know you're sitting there next to him. One of you, answer the damn phone! The damn ghost possessed the idiot, and now he won't stop pawing me. Tell me how to get him back to normal!"

"Rikuo, don't you want me? I want you."

"Damn it, don't do that! Ack! Don't touch me there!"

_Click._

+++

"Thank you for calling the Green Drugstore. Our store hours are 10am to 6pm daily. If this is an emergency, be assured that one of our delivery boys are on their way. If you have a private matter that you wish to discuss with the manager, please leave your name and number after the beep. We appreciate your business here at Green Drugstore. Have a pleasant day."

_Beep._

"Kakei-san, my part-timer has seemed to pick up two strays that I believe belong to you."

"We're not strays! And we don't belong to Kakei-san!"

"Don't even bother trying to argue with Yuuko-san. Trust me, it doesn't help. She'll just make you work harder and get her more sake."

"Oi, I want more tempura."

"Me, too."

"You damn jerk! Get your own tempura, Doumeki! And you! I don't even know you!"

"He always like this?"

"Hn."

"You're two part-timers are entertaining, Kakei-san, Saiga-kun. Perhaps I'll keep them around for a while. They can keep Watanuki company."

"I don't need any more company, Yuuko-san!"

"We have to get back to the store or Kakei-san won't pay us!"

"If you wish to discuss payment, you know how to reach me."

_Click._

+++

"You have reached the Wish Shop. Your calling is hitsuzen. My not answering your call is hitsuzen, as well. I will return your call if you leave a message. Have a wonderful day."

_Beep._

"Yuuko-san, I know that you wish to play games, but phone tag has never been a favorite of mine. My being able to see the future kills any thrill it may possess. I had expected the same for you, but if you are so willing to play this game, then perhaps you are so drunk that you still see entertainment in this. As for Rikuo and Kazahaya-"

"Keep 'em, Yuuko. At least for the next week or so. I haven't had much alone time with Kakei now that Boy-O and Rikuo realized they can call and complain about the missions."

"Saiga, please be quiet. As I was saying, Yuuko-san. You may keep them for a few days. They should prove useful to you, and Saiga will be grateful, I'm sure. In regards to payment, I have a vintage bottle of sake that might interest you. Do call me back if you will accept that as proficient payment."

_Click._

+++

"Thank you for calling the Green Drugstore. Our store hours are 10am to 6pm daily. If this is an emergency, be assured that one of our delivery boys are on their way. If you have a private matter that you wish to discuss with the manager, please leave your name and number after the beep. We appreciate your business here at Green Drugstore. Have a pleasant day."

_Beep._

"You always wish to kill my fun, don't you Kakei? You and Clow. I'm inclined to believe that you don't love me. At least Saiga is honest. As for the sake, I'll send Watanuki and Doumeki-kun to pick it up after school today."

_Click._

+++

"You have reached the Wish Shop. Your calling is hitsuzen. My not answering your call is hitsuzen, as well. I will return your call if you leave a message. Have a wonderful day."

_Beep._

"Why do I have to pick up your damn sake, Yuuko-san? Why don't you go get it yourself? And why does that jerk have to go with me?"

_Click._

+++

"You have reached Watanuki Kimihiro. I apologize for not being able to answer the phone, but I'm probably in some dangerous situation or another because of Yuuko-san. If I survive, I'll make sure to return your call if you leave a name and a number where I can reach you. Enjoy your day."

_Beep._

"Watanuki, you and Doumeki-kun are such good friends, so why shouldn't he accompany you? And maybe you two could stop and watch a movie before coming to work. After all, I have two more wonderful helpers already here."

"Watanuki-san! Don't leave me alone with her!"

"Shut up, idiot, and clean."

"Don't tell me what to do, asshole!"

"Take your time getting here, Watanuki. And don't worry, I won't dock your pay. Say hello to Doumeki-kun for me. Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"

_Click._


End file.
